Back in HK

It was an uneventful trip back to the U.S.  Saw some friends and had some yummy food and did a little bit of shopping.  But my mind was on work the entire time--it was just bad timing with the manuscript due at the end of the month.  And, oh right, applications!!!

It's that awful feeling of "what should I do first" every day.  It was difficult to get a good night's rest. I was already on a topsy-turvy schedule in HK, so in a way, I was not ever really jetlagged.  lol

I pretty much spent the entire day in my room, a.k.a. my cave, and worked on the paper for two days, coming out for Thanksgiving dinner #1 on Thursday and Thanksgiving dinner #2 on Friday.  It got to be so overwhelming that on Saturday at around 3 a.m. I just wanted to cry.  But who was up at that hour that I could call?!?!  My friends in HK.  So I opened up a group on whatsapp "Pretty sure it's pms...".  Nat came on first and Dorothy chimed in for a bit.  "Remember why you came to HK...for the experience.  It's just a job...focus on your apps."  I needed the kick in the butt.  And then Hale came on, after 70+ messages.

Then 200+ messages later...Tiff added her support.  Why does it say "Wesley"?  Because Tiff doesn't have a smartphone.  She has an "iTorch"--her phone is only good for dialing out, receiving calls, and maybe shine a little light on something in the dark.  So we whatsapp her on her boyfriend's phone.  Poor Wesley's phone was exploding that night.  lol lol lol

 

Talking to them reminded me that I'm not alone in this.  Sometimes it's a little scary to be vulnerable around people...to admit self-doubt and insecurities.  Or how much I just want to quit doing what I'm doing.  To admit to active self-sabotage.  And then people let you lean on them, and borrow their strength.  Empathy.  My awesome friends in HK have taken care of me for the past two months when my schedule started to shift with studying for the GREs.  I am so incredibly grateful for their kindness, good humor, and generosity.  God has been really amazing in helping me build a social support network that has enriched my life immensely.  I am still a bit demoralized by all the work that has to be accomplished in the next 48 hours, but am feeling calmer and lighter knowing I have people to celebrate with on Sunday.  Or some other day when I need a little pick-me-up.  Yay for girlfriends!